It was very difficult for me to leave my family and come and adjust in  America, where you do not know a soul.That is why, I believe I share the poet’s beliefs that the sufferings and hardships he has to face in this country will make a better person out of him. Like him, I too, feel that this struggle is a good thing and “love this cultured hell that tests my youth”.

The night I lost you
someone pointed me towards
the Five Stages of Grief
Go that way, they said,
it’s easy, like learning to climb
stairs after the amputation.
And so I climbed.
Denial was first.
I sat down at breakfast
carefully setting the table
for two. I passed you the toast—
you sat there. I passed
you the paper—you hid
behind it.
Anger seemed so familiar.
I burned the toast, snatched
the paper and read the headlines myself.
But they mentioned your departure,
and so I moved on to
Bargaining. What could I exchange
for you? The silence
after storms? My typing fingers?
Before I could decide, Depression
came puffing up, a poor relation
its suitcase tied together
with string. In the suitcase
were bandages for the eyes
and bottles sleep. I slid
all the way down the stairs
feeling nothing.
And all the time Hope
flashed on and off
in defective neon.
Hope was a signpost pointing
straight in the air.
Hope was my uncle’s middle name,
he died of it.
After a year I am still climbing, though my feet slip
on your stone face.
The treeline
has long since disappeared;
green is a color
I have forgotten.
But now I see what I am climbing
towards: Acceptance
written in capital letters,
a special headline:
Acceptance
its name is in lights.
I struggle on,
waving and shouting.
Below, my whole life spreads its surf,
all the landscapes I’ve ever known
or dreamed of. Below
a fish jumps: the pulse
in your neck.
Acceptance. I finally
reach it.
But something is wrong.
Grief is a circular staircse.
I have lost you.

The central theme of this poem is the five stages that a grieving person goes through– denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. This notion that grief has five stages was first introduced by the famous Swiss Psychiatrist- Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. According to her, these are the basic stages a bereaved person goes through; but, not necessarily in the same order. In case of some people, depression may set in  before bargaining or anger, while some may never reach the acceptance stage. Talking about the poem, what I like about  it is that it evocatively describes the pain that must be endured in order to surpass the stages of grief. Although I have not fathomed  every line of this poignant poem, I really loved the part where she mentions hope.

My name is Abhishek Dangol and I am from the Himalayan nation of Nepal. For those who have never heard of Nepal before( I am sure there are quite a few), it is where Mount Everest lies and where Buddha was born around 2500 years ago. Like most people in my country, I am a Hindu. I arrived in US on new year’s eve of 2008. I spent my first semester in Oklahoma but decided to transfer here because most of my close friends are studying in Houston. So far, I am enjoying my stay in America and have met a lot of interesting and kind-hearted people over the past eight months. I like to play the guitar and listen to rock music. I also enjoy travelling and reading novels. Some of my favorite writers include Chekhov, Goethe, Erich-maria Remarque and Dostoevsky.